


When You Left For Santa Monica

by That_Is_Americas_Ass



Series: Stranger Drabbles [6]
Category: Stranger Things (TV 2016)
Genre: Angry Billy Hargrove, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Billy Hargrove Is Bad at Feelings, Billy Hargrove Needs a Hug, Billy is trying, Billy's mother, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Everything Hurts, Everything is Beautiful and Everything Hurts, Good Sibling Maxine "Max" Mayfield, Heavy Angst, Neil Hargrove Being an Asshole, Poor Billy, Poor Max, Pre-Canon, Protective Siblings, Sad with a Happy Ending, Sibling Bonding, Sibling Love, Susan Being An Idiot, The Author Regrets Everything, What Happened With Billy's Mom
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-27
Updated: 2019-09-27
Packaged: 2020-10-29 01:28:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,343
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20788316
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/That_Is_Americas_Ass/pseuds/That_Is_Americas_Ass
Summary: When Neil tells Billy they are moving to Indiana, all Billy wants to do is run away and find his mom.So he does.He manages to find her in a suburb in Santa Monica. Jumping in the camaro he takes off to find her. When he does he wants to just rush into her arms and beg her to let him stay, and he would have.If it weren't for the baby in her arms...





	When You Left For Santa Monica

**Author's Note:**

> So, when I first heard Theory of a Deadman - Santa Monica, this idea popped into my head and to be honest I almost started crying. I don't have any problems with Billy's mother and since it is never really explained what happened to her, whether it is just divorce or perhaps she died, it leaves the door open for plot bunnies. This was my take on Billy's mom and their relationship, or what it could have been like before the big move to Indiana, and the relationship between Billy and Max. So, this addition is based around Billy and Max, what could have went down in California before the big move, and why Billy's mother is never in the picture.
> 
> Be prepared for some heavy angst and obviously some heavy language, it's Billy so come on. 
> 
> If you have never heard the song Santa Monica by Theory of a Deadman, listen to it while reading! 
> 
> As always, enjoy.

_And I remember the day when you left for Santa Monica_

_You left me to remain with all your excuses for everything_

_And I remember the time when you left it all behind_

_And I remember the day you told me it's over_

_And I remember the day when you left for Santa Monica_

_You left me to remain with all your excuses for everything_

_And I remember the time when you left for Santa Monica_

_Yeah, I remember the day you told me it's over_

The first time Billy was forced to meet his dad's new girlfriend, Susan, and her young daughter, Maxine, he'd been less than thrilled. Neil had been through multiple girlfriends ever since Billy's mom left him but none stuck around for long.

No one could blame them either.

Neil Hargrove was not what you would call _husband material_. Most women only wanted him for what was in his pants, or they liked being spoiled, one or the other. Neil had a mean streak a mile wide, one that Billy seemed to inherit, and he would often take out his anger on innocent people. The cops had been called to their home more times than Billy could count because of concerned neighbors. Any time police got involved, which was often, Neil would talk his way out of trouble and whatever girl he'd been would be gone within a couple days.

It was an endless cycle.

Billy didn't think much of it when his dad told him he was seeing someone new, a bank teller named Susan Mayfield, recently divorced with a daughter younger than Billy. Then again, Billy hadn't expected to be forced into meeting Susan or her daughter, and yet Neil had demanded Billy accompany them to the pier for an outing. Billy had of course taken his time getting there, he wasn't exactly up for playing mini golf, arriving a couple hours after noon.

Neil hadn't been happy with him, glaring at him while he introduced Susan and her daughter. Susan was pretty typical for the type of woman Neil Hargrove went for. Small, thin, timid. The woman had barely looked Billy in the eye when they met.

Yep, defiantly Neil's type.

The little girl standing off to the side of Susan stepped forward, looking past Billy to where his camaro was parked. Her eyes lit up as she stared at the muscle car, an appreciative look in her eyes that Billy was familiar with.

"Is that a 77' Camaro?" she asked, her eyes moving to look up at Billy instead of the car.

"Maxine," Susan lightly scolded her. "Please, use your manners."

Maxine rolled her eyes slightly and spoke again, with a good amount of forced pleasantness in her voice.

"Hi, Billy. I'm Max, Max Mayfield. Nice to meet you. _Is that a 77' Camaro?"_

Billy couldn't fight back the grin as he stared down at Max, he liked the kid already. Whatever Billy had been expecting from the little red head, maybe a true miniature version of her mom, it wasn't anything like what Max seemed to be.

"78' LT, fixed her up myself," he corrected her. Billy was proud of his ride, always ready to show her off to anyone willing to listen. He'd pulled the camaro out of a scrap yard and rebuilt it piece by piece.

It was his pride and joy, and it was the one thing Neil would never be able to touch.

"It's beautiful," Max complimented sincerely. Her mom still looked slightly annoyed with her, but it didn't look like Max cared what her mom thought. In fact, just from the way Max held herself she didn't seem to care what anyone thought of her. That kind of attitude would either get her far in life or in serious trouble.

After a few hours and an awkward dinner, Billy was left standing on the pier with Max next to him while their parents walked the beach together. It was a disgustingly love sick sight to watch Neil play on the charm to woo Susan. It was an act Billy had seen many times before. His dad would act like a perfect gentleman, the perfect man, and lure women into a false sense of security.

None of them knew what kind of monster the man really was.

That or they just didn't care.

Either way, Billy didn't think Susan would be any different. The woman was clearly the definition of lonely housewife. Her seemingly timid nature was most likely what drew Neil to her in the first place. Billy wondered briefly how the two even met. The only thing that made Susan different from the previous women his dad had brought home was that she had a child. None of the women before had been mothers, much less mother material.

Billy hadn't been too sure what to think of that development. He'd always been an only child. There had been times he had wondered what it would have been like to be a brother to a younger brother or sister, but he'd let go of those dreams long ago after his mom left. After spending some time with Max though, Billy couldn't help but be impressed with the little girl. Not only was she a tomboy, she loved comics and was apparently killer at arcade games.

Oh, and she loved to skateboard.

It was kind of hard for Billy to not be impressed. He'd never met a girl as young as Max that had a passion for skateboarding, much less video games. Along with Max's good taste in hobbies, she also liked the same kind of music as Billy, stans Metallica. The only thing he did give her shit on was her love of Madonna.

Max also had a love for muscle cars. Her dream was to drive up and down the California coastline in a Plymouth Barracuda, a hardtop fastback. Not a bad choice for a car. Billy had to give her props for knowing her shit, he'd give her that much.

All in all, the kid wasn't so bad.

Unfortunately, Billy couldn't say the same thing for Susan. The woman was just too poor-spirited for his tastes, almost timorous in a way. The complete opposite of her daughter.

It wouldn't be until many months later that Billy learned just how spineless Susan Mayfield really was.

* * *

Love.

That's what Neil called it.

He was so in _love_ with Susan.

Billy scoffed at the idea the first time he'd heard his dad tell Susan he loved her. Whatever they had between them was not love.

To quote REO Speedwagon; _That ain't love, I believe you've got the wrong emotion._

Dependent.

Addicted.

Over-reliant.

Fixated.

Hooked.

Control.

Desire.

Lust.

Whatever it was, it sure as hell wasn't love. Over the months Neil and Susan's relationship went from casually seeing each other to Susan and Max moving in.

Once again, Billy was less than pleased.

Now the small house that hardly felt like a home to begin with was now occupied by two more people. Billy didn't mind having Max around so much as he hated the idea of sharing a house with Susan.

Why?

Because the bitch fucking knew the truth about how Neil Hargrove acted as a parent, how he abused Billy and degraded him like trash, and she didn't say or do a god damn thing.

The first time Neil went after Billy and landed a hard slap to his cheek with Susan in the room, the woman had just fucking stood there quietly like nothing was wrong. She just stood there like a good little toy and averted her eyes. If Billy had any respect for Susan Mayfield before, it was long gone after that incident.

That new development also scared the shit outta him.  
If Neil felt safe enough to physically assault his son in front of his girlfriend, what kind of hold did Neil have on Susan? Was the woman that blind? Or was she so far down the rabbit hole in her perfect family fantasy that she just didn't give a shit?

Needless to say, it spelled trouble.

After Susan and Max moved in with the Hargrove's, a pattern slowly but surely began to develop. Neil and Susan would go off on _mini vacations_ periodically, leaving Billy and Max alone for anywhere from a day to a week. It was never planned out or anything, usually just random excursions.

Billy and Max were never invited.

The first couple times it happened Billy had asked Max if it was normal for Susan to just up and leave her like that to go off on trips? To his surprise, Max was not the least bit shocked and claimed that her mom had a thing for going off to stay at resorts and other fancy shit. She'd done it all the time with her previous boyfriends that Max had just grown used to it over the years. After getting the whole story from Max, which included a brief explanation that had Billy gagging in revulsion, he began to understand why his dad had hooked up with Susan.

Apparently, the woman was a bit of a nymphomaniac and always demanded to go off on trips, keeping her kink filled sex life far away from Maxine. It certainly explained why Neil fell for her.

In the end, Billy didn't know what bothered him more. The fact that Susan seemed to have no issue with leaving her daughter to fend for herself, or that Max actually knew the truth behind her moms fucked up idiosyncrasies! For god's sake Max was only 10 years old! What kind of woman not only leaves her kid alone for who knows how long, to care for herself, but also seemed perfectly okay with moving in with a child abuser?

_Susan Mayfield everyone!_

So, over the following months, Billy made it his job to look after Max by himself. With Neil and Susan fucking off to who the hell knows where all the time, Max obviously needed someone to stick around and make sure she survived on more than just cheap microwave burritos. Billy didn't know why but he found himself continuously keeping a close eye on Max, even at home, an odd fondness for the little girl had somehow burrowed itself in his chest. He could give two shits about his old man and Susan, but he honestly did care for Max. The kid drove him crazy sometimes, that was no lie, but Max slowly wormed her way into his life. There were times when he was a little too hard on her, too overbearing, but he didn't want Max to end up like himself.

A target for Neil.

To prevent that from happening, since Billy didn't trust Susan to do so, he would keep constant tabs on Max and keep her in line as best he could. Max would act out sometimes, what kid didn't? But unlike Neil, Billy never put his hands on her. He would grab her sometimes, maybe scare her, but he never hit her like Neil would do to him. So long as he could keep Max under control and out of Neil's sights then that was all Billy cared about.

He may be a punk ass teen that deserved Neil's rage every now and then, but Max was an innocent child that didn't know about the horrors of the Hargrove household yet. If Billy had any choice, she never would.

Things continued on just the same for a couple more months. Neil and Susan would leave for their trips, leaving Max with Billy, and life carried on.

And then came the day Billy still thought about with displeasure...

* * *

The day had started out like any other.

Billy woke up early and began his daily workout, turning on his stereo to blast some rock n' roll while he worked his muscles. It was the beginning of spring and the weather was very pleasant. Every window in the house was open to let fresh air in. It was still early but they did have school that day.

Neil and Susan were supposed to be back that day from a sudden trip to Las Vegas. The couple had been gone for almost a full week. They hadn't explained what prompted the quick trip, just that they would return by the end of the week.

Typical.

Besides the nice weather, the week hadn't been great.

Max's dad was supposed to visit her that week and had never shown up, though seeing as how neither Susan nor Neil was present that probably hadn't been a bad thing. However, the asshole hadn't even bothered to call and explain why he didn't come see Max, it broke the girl's heart. Billy had watched Max wait by the phone the first evening just waiting for a phone call. When they heard no word from Sam Mayfield over the next few days, Max had brokenly told Billy that she should be used to it by now.

It hadn't been the first time her dad pulled that shit.

The whole thing just irritated Billy to no end. It brought back unwanted memories of his own broken family, watching his mom walk out on them and refusing to talk to him. He could understand why his mom never wanted to see Neil, but he never understood why she left him behind.

So, yeah, missing parents aside, the week had been pretty uneventful.

Max had been mopey all week, sticking to her room or skating around out on the street. What annoyed them both was the fact that Max's dad could just fly her up to see him instead, but never gave Max that option. He always came to her. After the big divorce between her parents, Max learned that her dad had sold their old home and moved somewhere up near San Francisco. That didn't surprise Max in the least, but what did shock her was that her dad refused to let her come visit him at his new home. He was always very distant about it, giving Max the strong impression that she was not welcome there.

And didn't that just suck.

Max had never been overly close to her dad but given the option she would have rather lived with him than her mom. She did love her mom, but sometimes she wanted to scream at her to act like a mother instead of an absent parent. It wasn't fair to Max and it sure as hell wasn't fair to Billy, who always got stuck looking after her.

_Speaking of..._

"Max, get your ass outta bed!"

_Yep, school._

"I'm up!" Max yelled through the closed door as she threw off her covers. Who needed an alarm clock when you lived with Billy Hargrove?

Checking her clock and seeing that she wouldn't have time for a shower, Max groaned and slumped her way to her closet in search of some clean clothes. They'd forgotten to do laundry that week. With the mess of her dad backing out on his visit and their shortage of food money, neither Max nor Billy had been in great moods that week.

Or, more like Billy hadn't been in a great mood all week and Max knew it was because of what she had said about her dad constantly abandoning her like he did. She knew all about Billy's mother and how she had left him behind with Neil. Max had asked Billy only once about his mom and he'd given her the short version of what happened between them, demanding she never bring it up again. After that, Max began to piece together what happened on her own. Billy's mom abandon him just like Max's dad left her, without warning, without seeming to even care. It broke her heart to know that that was why Billy was the way he was. He pushed people away because he'd been left behind by someone he loved.

She could sympathize with that.

It made her feel bad that she was inadvertently the cause for Billy's bad mood. She'd done her best to stay out of his way and keep a low profile, staying in her room or skating outside to give him space. It was always best to stay out of Billy's way when he was angry, which was most of the time, but Max knew Billy wouldn't focus his rage on her unless she was the cause of it. In this case, she wasn't _exactly_ the reason, but if it involved Billy's mom then she didn't want to test his ire.

Better to be safe than sorry.

Rifling through her clothes on the floor she managed to find a pair of torn jeans and slipped them on with a pair of mismatched socks. What she couldn't find was a shirt. Or her other shoe!

"Is there any clean clothes in the dryer?" she cried as she sprinted across the house to the laundry room, sifting through more and more clothes that weren't her own. She could hear Billy groaning in annoyance from the living room, more than likely ready to leave.

"Swear to god, Max..." he grumbled, walking back into his room and coming out with a small black shirt that was too tight on him, one of his old AC-DC ones.

"Wear that, now let's go!" he demanded, searching for his keys and wallet.  
Max smelled the shirt just to make sure it was clean. It smelled like Billy's cologne and very faintly of cigarette smoke but it would do. Shrugging off her night shirt she quickly adjusted her bra and slipped the clean shirt on, hopping on one foot as she tried to get her other shoe on.

"I didn't get to brush my hair!" she said and headed for the bathroom, but Billy intercepted her and pushed her towards the front door instead.

"Brush it in the car, we're gonna be late."

Max rolled her eyes but conceded, grabbing her backpack and her skateboard by the front door and followed Billy outside. The second she sat down in the passenger seat she opened up the glove compartment and grabbed the hairbrush Billy stored in there. With a head full of hair like Billy's, the guy stored hair crap everywhere.

They tore out of the driveway and headed for the school at top speed.

Max struggled with her long locks and grumbled angrily when they refused to cooperate with her. It also didn't help that Billy kept the windows rolled down! Her mom was always trying to put stuff in her hair that would tame it a little but Max didn't like any of that stuff. It always made her hair feel weird. She preferred a natural feel rather than chemical induced silky smooth trusses.

_Call her a weirdo._

By the time they reached the school parking lot, Max had given up on trying to smooth down her hair. It would just have to remain wild for the day.

Billy seemed to take pity on her though, snatching the brush from her hand and telling her to turn around and hold still. He grabbed a scrunchie from the glove-box and quickly gathered all of Max's hair up into a quick ponytail, smoothing it down as best he could.

Max stayed pliant as Billy worked on her. She always preferred Billy fixing her hair over her mom doing it, her mom always pulled too hard.

"There, now get. And don't be late," Billy warned her as they left the car to head to class. Max rolled her eyes but did as she was told and headed off towards the middle school on her board.

By the end of the school day, Billy had been pushed to his limit. Not only had he been late to first period but he'd nearly failed his surprise science test that the teacher sprang on them. Basketball practice had sucked even more, not because of anything bad it was just that Billy found no challenge in the game anymore. It made for a very boring game. Lunch had consisted of whatever mystery meat the school fed them and trying to avoid the head cheerleader, Allison, who Billy had slept with one time and couldn't take the hint to back off. For those reasons, Billy's day had sucked and he was on edge by the time he reached the car.

_An empty car._

"God dammit, Maxine," he growled and tossed his bag into the backseat with a snarl, reaching into his jacket to pull out a cigarette. Breathing in the toxic smoke helped to calm him down a little but he was still pissed Max was late. He wanted to go home and crash before Neil and Susan got home.

Checking his watch, Billy noted that it had only been 5 minutes but it felt like forever. He ended up finishing off a couple more smokes before seeing Max burst through the middle school doors, her face pinched up in distress as she rushed over to the camaro.

Billy tossed his smoke to the ground and walked around to the driver side, throwing open the door to slide in. One look at Max told him she was upset about something.

"What happened," he asked darkly, wishing he could channel his anger onto someone else. If some punk was messing with Max then Billy would gladly knock them around for awhile, release some of his pent up rage.

Max sniffed and shrugged like nothing was wrong, "Just some stupid kids mouthing off, that's all."

That just wouldn't do.

"Who?" he demanded, taking out another smoke to light.

"Why does it matter?"

Billy was not in any mood to argue with her and raised his voice to show just how little patience he had left.

"Because I said so, now who was it!"

Max shrunk away from him for a second, pushing closer to the door and wiped her eyes. She hated it when he yelled at her. Knowing it was pointless to try and argue with him, Max searched the school grounds for the assholes who wouldn't leave her alone. After a minute she spotted them hanging around the side doors.

"Those two, by the side doors." She pointed over to the side of the building where Billy saw a couple older kids leaning against the brick, passing what looked to be a joint back and forth while laughing. He vaguely recognized the boys, knowing they were not high schoolers but they were both older than Max. He also knew one of the shitheads had a bad reputation, not as bad as Billy's though.

"What'd they say to you?"

Max didn't really know how to answer that question without blowing it out of proportion. The boys were bullies, they said mean shit to her all the time and called her names like _ginger snap_ or _dyke_ and constantly made fun of her red hair. Another reason they teased her and gave her Hell was because she was the only girl that rode a skateboard at school. Neither of them had ever touched her before, but today one of them jerked her ponytail really hard and caused her to fall backwards in the hallway. Most of the kids standing around just laughed at her, no one bothered to help her up, and of course the assholes knocked her books all over the ground after shoving her skateboard rolling down the hallway.

Hence, her being late to the car.

But, she knew for a fact that if she told Billy about what they'd done today he would lose his shit. Not that she really cared about the other boys or what happened to them, but she didn't want Billy getting in trouble for something she could handle.

"They just make fun of my red hair and other shit, it's just talk. I don't think they're stupid enough to try anything else," she mumbled softly, gently removing the scrunchie from her hair to toss it back in the glove-box.

Billy seemed to buy it, starting up the camaro with a grunt and pulling out of the parking lot, tearing down the highway. The radio was blasting out _Motley Crue_ before they even reached the end of the block. He silently made a mental note to _chat _with the punks the next time he caught them outside the school. 

By the time Billy and Max heard the tale sign of Neil's truck pulling into the driveway, it was already getting late in the day. The sun had already begun it's decent for the evening at it was getting cool outside. Billy was in the living room watching TV while Max was in her room working on her homework. They hadn't eaten yet, waiting for their parents return. Billy's stomach was already growling, having only eaten lunch that day. The sound of the front door opening broke him out of his thoughts, hopping up from the couch.

Neil burst in the door first, carrying both his and Susan's bags into the house. Susan followed in behind him with a smile as she closed the door behind them. They looked pleased about something, a strange look on Neil's face Billy was unfamiliar with.

What the hell was going on?

"Billy, your father and I have some great news for you and Max," Susan began excitedly, holding Neil's hand in her own.

Now Billy felt even more anxious about their odd behavior. Before he could ask them what news they were so happy about, Max stumbled out of her bedroom to come greet them. She gave them a soft smile and asked them how their trip went.

"Sweetheart, we have some great news," Susan said again, smiling at her daughter.

Max seemed to be just as thrown off about their weirdness as Billy was. She looked between them and crossed her arms, waiting for them to say whatever news it was. However, when she glanced down at their clasped hands and saw the shiny rock on her moms ring finger, she knew exactly why they were acting strange.

_Holy shit..._

"Neil and I got married!" Susan cried happily, showing them her brand new wedding band, a small diamond right in the center of it. "Isn't that exciting?"

Max and Billy stared slack jawed at their parents, both too shocked to even form words.

_Holy...shit..._

"You did...what?" Max whispered shakily, staring at the ring on her moms finger. When she looked to Neil's hand she noticed the matching gold band gracing his finger as well. What the fuck was happening?

"Neil proposed right before we left for our trip and so we just decided to get married while we were in Vegas, we even got married by Elvis!" Susan giggled, like the whole thing was funny to her.

News flash, it was far from amusing.

"So you just what, ran off to Vegas so you could elope?" Max growled, fury dancing in her eyes. "You and dad haven't even been divorced a year and you just ran off and got hitched to someone else?"

Both Susan and Neil seemed taken aback by Max's outrage. They both tried to explain quickly that it wasn't exactly _eloping_ so much as just a quick decision to tie the knot, something they'd apparently been talking about for awhile now.

All that did was make the whole argument worse.

"When exactly were you planning on telling us about any of this? Were you both just making plans behind our backs this whole time?" Max demanded angrily, her eyes beginning to water from the frustration of it all.

"Honestly, Maxine, I don't know why you're reacting this way?" Susan admonished, exasperated at her daughters attitude. Clearly the woman didn't see any issue with what she and Neil had done.

"Maxine, that is no way to speak to your mother," Neil scolded with a mild glare. The tone of his voice and his subtle step forward had Billy moving himself in front of Max. He didn't push Max behind him so much as he just body blocked her, keeping himself between her and his dad. He wouldn't take any chances with his dad's anger.

Max choked back her cries and turned away from her mom, walking off to her room with a soft, "I can't do this right now."

The second Max's bedroom door closed, Neil turned to Billy and asked what he thought, even though Billy knew his dad didn't care about his opinion one bit. During the whole argument with Max, Billy had stayed quiet, unable to even process the whole thing. There was no way he could do this, he couldn't fucking handle this now.

He did the only thing he could think to do.

He grabbed his keys and walked out the door.

Behind him, Neil yelled at him to come back and Susan made a quiet noise of dismay. Billy could have cared less about either of them right then. He just wanted to get away from his dad and his new _stepmother. _

_S_ _tepmother..._

That was a word he'd never considered before.

Just the thought of having another woman come in and act the role of _mom_ made him sick to his stomach. He didn't want anyone else. He didn't want a fake family that played the perfect role for everyone's eyes, like Neil always tried to do.

Family was just another F-word to Billy.

Right between _fucked_ and _fake_.

How the fuck had this happened? Billy hadn't honestly believed Susan would stick around and marry his dad, because who in their right mind would tie themselves to a heartless monster like Neil Hargrove?

Billy made it to the end of the driveway in his silent rage. All he wanted to do was take off and drive somewhere, straight off the goddamn pier maybe.

Cursing, he fumbled with his key ring and dropped them a couple times, his shaking hands vibrating with the urge to hit something, to slam his fists until they were black and crusted with blood. As angry as he was he knew Max was just as upset about all the bullshit too.

Max...

Glaring, he looked back towards the house and took a few deep breaths. The kid had no choice in this anymore than Billy did. He didn't _necessarily_ blame Max for this shit, she was a victim of circumstance just as much as he was, and it was actually worse for Max because she was younger. Her life would no doubt spiral out of control because of all this.

It wasn't her fault.

It wasn't Max's fault.

Billy would just have to keep reminding himself of that...

Growling, he turned and stomped back towards the house. Foregoing the door, he moved around the side of the house until he reached Max's bedroom window. It was still unlocked from earlier in the day so Billy just shoved it up, startling Max who was sitting on her bed silently crying. Without a word he just quickly motioned for her to get up and come on. She jumped up from the bed and grabbed her jacket, rushing to the window before Billy could change his mind and leave her behind. She let him hoist her up through the window and onto the ground, following behind him the second her feet touched the grass.

Max climbed into the passenger seat of the camaro silently, wiping her eyes free of tears as she tried to calm down. She knew Billy was beyond pissed, enraged would have been the best way to describe him in that moment, which is why she was shocked he'd bothered to bring her along at all. Surely he was angry at her as well, even if she was just as upset about their parents getting married in secret as she was.

In that moment though, nothing mattered except getting away for awhile.

They could fight each other later.

Billy drove silently, not even bothering to turn on the radio or play one of his tapes. The fury in his eyes had not diminished at all, nor had the white knuckled grip he had on the wheel, even his harsh breathing was enough to keep Max from saying anything. They drove along the streets mindlessly, passing houses and street lamps blindly as Billy fought to control his temper. He had no idea where they were going nor did he care, just so long as he didn't have to see Neil or Susan again that night.

What the fuck was his dad thinking?

That they would suddenly become some big, happy family?

They'd already tried the prefect family thing before and look what happened. It ended with Neil becoming a raging maniac and Billy's mother walking out the door...

Billy clenched his jaw when he felt his eyes begin to blur with tears. He didn't want to think about her, or what she'd done, how she left them. Even though Billy knew she had every right to end a relationship that ended in violence he would never understand why she left him behind too. Neil Hargrove saw no difference between a child and an adult, turning his persecution solely onto Billy.

Turning off the side road, he drove onto the highway and headed for the ocean at break neck speed. The camaro roared down the pavement as Billy continued to stew with his bitter thoughts. The urge to fight was still there. The unrelenting itch to throw his fists and physically hurt someone just so he wouldn't feel the way he did.

Anger was better than tears.

Better than grief.

Better than heartache.

He'd survived and grew in violence, thrived in it, until it became his first response.

Just like his old man...

"Billy?"

Max's voice broke him out of his murderous thoughts, turning his wild eyes to her. He was in no mood to talk so what the fuck did she want?

"Slow down," she whispered, glancing down at the gauges. Her voice remained soft so as not to agitate him any more than he already was.

Billy looked down at the speedometer and cursed, letting his foot come off the gas. They'd been pushing almost 90 miles an hour without him even realizing. Glancing over at the tiny red head beside him, he knew there was no chance of him getting into any bloody fights that night.

No matter how much he wished for one.

Slowing down, Billy continued to head for the beach. The ocean always had a calming affect on him for times like this. The sound of crashing waves eased his heart in ways fists never could. As a bonus, there was a cheap 24/7 pizza parlor right down the block that served up fantastic slices, the kind that are served with a Lipitor and a heart stent.

Within a few minutes, they pulled up to the pizza parlor with the neon blinking lights, the open sign lit up like an obnoxious Christmas tree.

Billy pulled out his wallet and silently handed Max a few bills, nodding to the front door so she could go get them something to eat.

Max obediently took the cash and quickly headed inside, knowing what to get Billy. She had most of his favorite foods memorized, and that included his weird love of double cheese pizza with olives and peppers. She placed an order for one pie, split down the middle so she had one half her way and Billy got his weird cheesy monstrosity.

Hopefully food would make them both feel better.

Outside in the car, Billy gripped the steering wheel tightly to the point that his fingers hurt, glaring at the window. He still couldn't wrap his head around his old man marrying Susan. Now she and Max would never fucking leave!

"Fuck!" he screamed, pounding his fists against the wheel, like a child throwing a tantrum, cursing his dad and the bitch he was now married to. They could both take a one-way trip to Hell for all he fucking cared anymore. He could tolerate Maxine, but there was no way he could handle Susan all the time, there was just no way. It was hard enough playing nice when she was around, pretending everything was fine, acting like the respectable son his dad made him out to be.

_Respectable._

What a joke.

Neil Hargrove didn't know what the word even meant. Was it respectable to slam your fist into the side of your wife's temple when she talked back?

Was that respect?

Or how about chasing your son through the house with a belt because he tried to protect his mom?

Did that sound like a respectable man?

Billy to scream and call his dad a hypocritical, lying sack-o-shit when he pulled out that respect and responsibility bullshit he was constantly on about.

Responsibility was _not_ leaving your teenage son to look after a little girl while you're off banging her mom in some motel room!

_It was bullshit._

It was utter and complete bullshit.

What was going to happen when Neil pulls his shit in front of Max? It would happen at some point, Billy knew that for a fact. What would happen to the kid when she learned what kind of man Neil was behind closed doors? Would Susan continue to tolerate and ignore Neil's behavior, turn her head and pretend everything was okay, or would she grow a damn spine and get lost while she stood a chance?

Billy knew that the only reason his mom stuck around for as long as she did was because of him, trying to shield him from Neil's cruelty. When she couldn't take it anymore, she bailed. So Billy could not fathom why a woman would willingly bind herself to a monster like Neil, knowing what he was capable of.

It didn't make a damn bit of sense to him.

Susan had seen first hand what Neil was like when someone didn't live up to his expectations. If the bitch believed Neil would spare her from his rage just because she was passive about his abuse towards Billy, she was dead wrong, because Billy had seen just how nonspecific Neil could be with his targets.

Woman or child, Neil saw no difference.

In his eyes, anyone who would disrespect him would then be deserving of punishment. If Susan so much as stepped out of line with Neil's ideology of what _family_ meant, then she would become just another victim of merciless rage.

Just like Billy's mother.

Beating his fists against the wheel, Billy felt his throat tighten up as he thought of the last time he'd seen his mom. Her beautiful blue eyes had been swollen black and blue, bruises lining her cheek and neck as she walked out the door and out of his life. That was the same night Billy had been beaten with a belt so hard he'd slept on his stomach for days, his back bruised and broken from hard leather.

Neil had never been remorseful, yet it seemed like with Billy as his only target he'd become a heartless bastard. He was never happy. Billy honestly could not remember the last time he'd even seen his dad happy.

Maybe the man was a true psychopath and just faked all his emotions.

_Good luck with your new husband, Susan._

"What the fuck am I supposed to do now?" he mumbled to himself, leaning his head down against his hands. There was no way he could just up and leave. That would mean leaving the brat behind as a target for his dad and that was something Billy would never be able to live with. No matter how much he may find Max annoying, which was a lot, he could never let her become prey to Neil's anger.

With Max's attitude, she wouldn't last a month.

Even though Billy would never physically hurt Max, not like Neil would, he would be no better than his old man or Susan if he just stood by, or left, and let Max become the scapegoat.

He was stuck looking out for the kid, whether he wanted to or not it seemed.

Suddenly, Max was back at the car with a large pizza box and two sodas, settling the box on her lap and flipping the lid open with a smile.

"Half and half? I even got you extra _extra_ cheese this time."

Billy looked from the steaming food back up to Max, seeing her smile softly. He was hit with a sudden wave of realization again, knowing Max was still very young and an innocent in all this madness. She was clueless to the horrors that would unfold in time for their family.

_It's not her fault._

Starting up the camaro, they headed down the block to the parking lot behind the pier. Leaving the car locked, they both removed their shoes and found a spot on the beach to eat, Max collapsing on the ground in a spray of sand. She grabbed the pizza and immediately dug in, stacking two slices together.

"You gotta learn to eat pizza the right way," Billy grumbled at her, snagging his own slice. He flicked sand at her when she stuck out her tongue.

The beach was mostly empty. A few tourists and locals were walking around near the pier, enjoying the nice weather of the evening, watching the rolling waves crash onto the shore. It was peaceful. There was just enough of a warm breeze to make the night feel amazing. If Billy wasn't worried about keeping an eye on Max he would just crash on the sand for the night, head back home tomorrow to face the chaos.

"The waters nice, we could swim?" Max asked, stuffing another slice into her mouth like a heathen.

"Absolutely not. Sharks are out, you know that," Billy scolded lightly. Any surfer knew that you didn't go into the water after sunset or before sunrise, the time of day when sharks were most active.

Plus, he didn't feel like swimming. All he wanted to do was relax and listen to the ocean for a few hours.

Maybe then he'd feel better.

They continued to eat in silence, watching a couple people pass them on the sand while casting them nods. It was getting late, definitely past Max's usual bedtime. The kid was half asleep as it was. She had finished off her food and had laid back on the ground, staring out at the starry night sky.

Billy followed suite and leaned back, letting the warmth from the sand soak into his skin as he closed his eyes. They were far enough up on the beach to avoid the tide, no reason to worry about getting wet.

"Can we stay here tonight?" Max whispered, turning to look at him. Her blue eyes were shinning softly in the moonlight, unshed tears at the edge of falling. The kid obviously didn't want to go back home and Billy didn't blame her. He didn't want to either.

Sighing, he figured one night away from the house of horrors wouldn't kill them.

"At dawn, we're gone."

Max nodded quickly and gave him another real smile, happy to just lay in the sand and watch the stars with him. Glancing over at the tiny redhead, Billy felt the ache inside his chest ease up just a little.

_It's not her fault..._

* * *

Over the course of the next year and half, Billy and Max had grown both closer and more distant with each other. It was a constant battle of wills between them. They had literally become the only constant in each others lives.

Neil and Susan were gone, constantly, on trips for both business and pleasure. In those times, Max and Billy were left on their own.

More precisely, Max was left in Billy's care.

This meant that they were forced to rely on each other.

Max would have to count on Billy to get them both to school and back, provide food and help her with anything she needed.

For Billy, it was like being shoved into a parent role he never wanted. Watching over Max and keeping her out of trouble, getting her to school, feeding her and making sure she's still breathing by the time their parents decided to come back home. He and Max had learned the in and outs of living with each other, mostly the odd quirks they each had and learning each others routine. The only time that system failed them was ironically when the adults would show back up in their lives!

Now, Billy had no problem taking on the role of caretaker for Max when Susan was gone, he was older than her and he was the _protective big brother._

What he _did_ have a problem with was Neil using that role against him...

It had started out as small occurrences, so minor that Billy hadn't caught on right away. For instance, Neil making Billy drive Max to the arcade. That was something he was used to doing anyway so he hadn't batted an eye, but it hadn't stopped there.

Next, it was _take Maxine to the beach with you._ Again, Billy wasn't too off put by that because Max made a great cheerleader and would score him on the waves.

But then it turned into things like, _take Maxine to her dentist appointment._

Or, _Maxine is home sick so stay with her._

Neil had begun asking Billy to do so many things for Max that he should not have to do. Billy didn't have any issues with looking after the kid but for fucks sake he was not her guardian!

It took Billy a few months to figure out just what his dad was doing.

The son of a bitch was using Max as a way to control Billy...

Neil, the manipulative asshole, had somehow spun a story to Susan about how Billy was becoming the best big brother to Maxine and that he wanted them to grow close. Susan ate it up, constantly gushing over what a nice boy Billy had become and how grateful she was that he was looking after his little sister.

It made him fucking sick.

Billy was the only one who seemed to see past Neil's lies. He knew the truth behind his dad's schemes. The bastard knew Billy cared about Max and used it to his advantage, trying to mold Billy into the perfect role he wanted him in, by taking away Billy's freedom. He knew exactly what his dad was thinking, if he took away all of Billy's free time and shoved Max onto him then Billy wouldn't have any chance of defying him.

_Devious prick._

It never ceased to make Billy furious, and sometimes that fury turned into a loaded missile which he unintentionally aimed at Max. He didn't always mean to snap at her or scare her, but sometimes she was just in the crossfire. It was times like that when Max would give him a look, one he was becoming familiar with, a look that screamed _I hate you..._

Which was perfectly fine with him.

At least if Max hated his guts then he wouldn't feel like scum when he unloaded his anger on her. If there was any love at all between them, then he wouldn't know how to live with himself for some of the shit he'd said to her in his rage.

Things she didn't deserve because it wasn't her fault.

He just had trouble remembering that sometimes.

Neither of them had ever said the word _love_ to each other. Billy would never claim to love Max, he didn't even think he was capable of that. He cared about her, there was no doubt, but love was too strong a word. He'd loved only one person in his life and look what that got him.

_Heartache._

He'd never put himself through that pain again.

If only he'd known then just how much heartache his mom would put him through...

* * *

"What the fuck do you mean we're moving to Indiana?"

Billy could only stare at his dad incredulously as he spun the news around in his head.

_Indiana._

_Moving. _

_Moving to Indiana._

Why in gods name were they moving to Indiana!?

"Do not use that kind of language in front of your sister. Now you heard me the first time, son, we're moving to Indiana for a fresh start," Neil explained with a minor scowl.

"What does that even mean!" Billy cried, unable to process all the shit his dad was saying. Off to the side, Susan was talking quietly to Max, something about Max's dad.

"Susan and I had a long talk with Maxine's father and we both agree that things would be easier on our family if we move. We've lived in this house long enough, Billy."

"So just because Susan's fighting with her ex, suddenly we have to leave California? How is that supposed to fix anything!"

"Watch it, you're on dangerous ground, son."

Billy turned away with a glare, clenching his teeth together and stomping off to his room. He slammed the door and was surprised his dad didn't reprimand him for it. Grabbing his pillow from the bed he shoved his face into it, screaming every profane insult he could think of against the fabric.

Outside the door, he could hear Max crying openly while Susan's hushed voice tried to console her. Had he not been ready to burst at the seems, Billy would have tried to calm her down himself but he knew if he so much as looked at either redhead he would break.

_This was their fault._

This was all their fault!

His life was going to be upended on it's axis and it was all because of that damn bitch his dad married and her worthless ex-husband! The two of them constantly arguing at each other had finally affected Billy's life in a way he couldn't forgive. If Susan had just fucking given Sam custody of Max then none of this shit would have happened!

But no, of course now they had to move because Susan and Neil wanted a _fresh start._ What the Hell did that even mean? It just sounded like a nice way of saying _fuck you I'm out!_

Billy knew all about the custody argument over Max, having overheard Susan on the phone a few times bitching at Sam, and knew that this elaborate plan to move away was Susan's idea. Neil was just going along with it.

In a burst of anger, Billy picked up his bedside lamp and threw it at the wall. The sound of it shattering against the wood pane was enough to ground him, keeping him from spiraling.

What was he supposed to do now? Should he go along with the plan and pack all his shit up to leave? Should he say fuck it all and take off himself, hold out until he's 18?

"What the fuck am I supposed to do?" he whispered brokenly, collapsing onto the floor beside the bed, choking back the tears threatening to fall.

It wasn't fair...

California was his home. He was meant for sandy beaches, ocean waves and salt water. His heart was made for the sea, not some hickville in the middle of nowhere Indiana.  
Everything he knew was in California. He'd been born and raised on the ocean shore. Hell, he knew how to swim before he knew how to walk. Some of his favorite memories took place on the beach, him learning to surf, watching his mom look for seashells in the sand.

His mom was still in California. The woman that he missed so much every single day. She lived a few hours away in Santa Monica.

_Wait..._

Billy was suddenly struck with an idea.

* * *

By morning, Billy had packed most of his personal belongings into a bag and stored it under his bed. Throwing together a quick pack, he grabbed all the spare cash he had saved up and shoved it into his pockets in case he needed it. The camaro had a full tank of gas and was ready to go.

All it needed was it's driver.

The house was quiet. He'd heard his dad and Susan leave early that morning to go somewhere, something about seeing a realtor.

Grabbing what he needed, Billy opened his bedroom door and locked it behind him. In the event he didn't come back, he didn't want anyone touching his stuff, especially his dad. If things worked out like he hoped then he would return for everything later on. As he moved towards the front door to leave though, Max's timid voice came up behind him from her bedroom door.

"Where are you going, Billy?"

_Shit._

Cursing, Billy turned around slightly to see Max still dressed in her pajamas with her hair all ruffled from sleep, clearly the kid had just woken up.

"Fuck off, Max."

"Why do you have a bag?" she asked, walking closer to him even when he backed away from her.

Billy didn't want to talk to her, much less explain himself to a 13 year old brat. Max wouldn't understand his problems anyway so what did it matter. She would never understand the crap he put up with from his old man, even though most of it revolved around Maxine anyway.

_It's not her fault._

But you know what, fuck that.

He could blame her if he wanted to.

"Billy?"

"I said fuck off! Go back to your room and leave me the Hell alone," he growled and turned back towards the door, ignoring the way Max jumped at the volume of his voice.

"You're leaving?" Max whispered, suddenly understanding his intentions. "Where are you going?"

Billy wanted to scream at her to just go the fuck away and let him leave, he didn't have to explain himself to her or anyone else. Nonetheless, he found himself tossing his bag onto the floor beside the door.

"Santa Monica," he admitted in a clipped tone, watching the realization cross over Max's eyes the second the words left his mouth. The kid knew _who_ was in Santa Monica and why Billy would be headed there.

"Why would you go to her?" Max asked softly, clearly not understanding his reasoning. She knew all about his mother and her abrupt departure from his life, why would he go back to her?

"Because at this point, shitbird, I'll do anything if it gets me the fuck away from you and that cunt you call a mom! Ever since you came around my life had been nothing but one major fucked up shitstorm, all because of you!" Billy seethed, taking an intimidating step towards her to make her back off.

"It's not my fault!" Max cried, trying to defend herself from his irate insults, cowering slightly under Billy's harsh glare. She could tell just from his body language that he was raging mad.

"The fuck it's not, Max! All I've done since you showed up is cart you around like a dog on a leash because Susan spends more time spreading her legs for my old man instead of takin' care of you like she's supposed to! Somehow that job got handed off to me and I'm fuckin' sick of it!" he screamed, watching Max flinch back like he'd slapped her.

"I'm not giving up my life here just because your fucked up parents hate each other," he snapped, ending the conversation while snatching his bag from the floor. He turned his back on her and grabbed his keys, ready to blow out and never look back.

Behind him, right as he was walking out the door, he heard Max quietly beg him not to go, "Please don't leave..."

_It's not her fault._

Billy only hesitated for a moment, shouldering his bag before slamming the door shut behind him. Unlocking the car, he tossed his bag in the passenger seat and ignored the heavy weight of guilt gnawing at his gut as he started the camaro, pulling out of the driveway and heading for the highway.

_It isn't her fault._

The second he reached the highway to head south, he turned up the radio as loud as he could take it and rolled all the windows down.

_It's not Max's fault..._

Maybe if he tried hard enough, he could ignore the silent tears rolling down his cheeks and the soft ache in his chest.

Maybe...

* * *

_Welcome to Santa Monica._

The minute Billy passed the welcome sign for the city of Santa Monica his heart began pounding in his chest. He'd only been to Santa Monica once before, but that was years ago, long before his mom left. The city was beautiful with it's palm lined streets, the ocean views visible from most of the roads, lovely women walking the streets in bikinis ready to soak up the sun.

Billy could see why his mom had moved there.

He stopped at a small tourist trap to grab a map of the city, quickly locating the route to take to reach the address where his mother was supposed to live. It was on the other side of the city in the residential part of Santa Monica, away from the main city. It wouldn't take him long to get there.

The drive up had taken him almost 5 hours.

The uncomfortable feeling inside his gut had only gotten stronger the closer he got to Santa Monica, the closer he got to his mother.

What would he say to her?

Would she let him stay with her?

There were so many things he wanted to ask, demand really. Why did she leave him behind when she left his dad? Why hadn't she ever come back? It had been years since he'd spoken to her, their last conversation hadn't gone so well. The last time he saw her was almost 8 years ago...when she walked out and never looked back.

The day she'd walked away without so much as an explanation to him.

The day she abandoned him...

Billy tried to shake away those dark thoughts. He wouldn't think about that shit now, not when he was so close to her.

Following the map, it takes him almost an hour to reach the neighborhood where his mom was supposed to live. The houses were typical cookie cutter homes, lining the perfectly trimmed streets with matching mailboxes at each driveway. Just an average suburban neighborhood.

It made him sick to see something so normal.

Searching the street, he quickly finds the right house at the end of the block. It's a nice home, with large windows and a pretty rose garden in the front. There was a wood swing hanging from the tree out front, a larger double porch swing next to it. From the street, Billy could also see a fenced in back yard and he could hear the sound of a dog barking from the other side of the wood fence. The whole scene looked to be straight out of a classic family show, complete with the picket fence and a dog.

_Normal._

Shuttering at the merry sight, Billy leaned his seat back a little and settled in. He was not brave enough to go up to the door and knock, preferring to stay in the car and just observe for awhile. He was only half sure about the address belonging to his mother, he could be wrong, which is why he wanted to confirm she lived there before waltzing up and knocking on her door.

He didn't have to wait very long.

Less than an hour later, a nice car pulled into the driveway and parked. Inside the house, Billy catches a flash of blonde hair from the large windows, a woman he knows all too well.

It really was her.

Billy watched with baited breath as the front door of the house opened and his mother walked out to greet whoever it was in the car.

With a baby in her arms...

From the car, an older man got out and smiled as Billy's mom walked out to greet him, balancing the baby on her hip. Then, the back door of the car opened up and a little boy rushed out to hug her, his blonde hair shinning in the sunlight as he babbled something to her happily.

_This couldn't be happening._

Billy felt his heart break, watching the woman he loved more than anything kiss her new husband while holding her new baby, smiling lovingly down at her new _son._

In that moment, Billy is hit with a sudden devastating realization.

_She replaced him..._

His mom found herself a new family and left him behind in the arms of a bastard father that didn't love him.

_...she didn't love him._

Watching the joyful family disappear into the house, Billy felt his eyes fill with tears, gripping the steering wheel tightly as his whole body began to shake violently.

_This wasn't happening!_

Unfelled fury burst up within him and Billy found himself beating the dash of his car violently, screaming at the top of his lungs in anguish, fresh tears rolling down his face as he belted out his pain. How could his mom be so content with her new life while he was left suffering in the background?

Didn't she care about his well-being at all?

Did she not love him?

_Obviously not._

He was left gasping from the pain inside his chest, his heart pounding furiously against his rib-cage. It felt like he was drowning in his torment. He didn't remember starting the camaro, nor did he remember leaving the city, but soon Billy found himself on the road heading back north towards home.

Right back to the family that didn't give a shit about him.

Back to the misery of his dad.

The biggest question racing through his mind was why his mother believed he was better off with Neil instead of her, or was he not worth her time?

Was he not worth an explanation at least?

She never told him why she left him behind, never gave him a straight answer. Was it because she began to see more and more of Neil in Billy? Every time Billy looked in the mirror he saw glimpses of his old man. His worst fear had always been that his mom would see him the same way he saw himself...a mirror image of Neil Hargrove. Sudden flashes of his last screaming match with Max shot before his eyes, the way he treated her, it was something his dad would have done.

He really was turning into his old man.

Was that why she left him behind?

If you leave someone at least fucking tell them why, because if there is one thing more painful than being left behind it's knowing you're not worth the explanation.

_Apparently he wasn't worth it..._

* * *

The minute Billy pulled into the driveway back home, he stormed through the house into his room and slammed the door shut. Neither Susan nor Neil were home, shocker, so Billy didn't have to worry about them asking questions. Throwing his bag to the floor and shoving his jacket off, he looked around his room and his eyes focused in on the picture he kept on his mirror by the closet.

The only picture he had of his mom, one that had been taken on the beach when he was learning to surf. She was smiling in a white dress, sandles in hand, her hat flopping in the wind as she looked at the camera laughing. It was one of the few happy memories he had.

_Bullshit._

Growling, he tore the photo down and quickly shoved it into his dresser drawer, out of sight, out of mind. He couldn't think straight. All he wanted to do was get completely wasted and forget what he saw.

_His mom smiling at a little boy that wasn't him._

Collapsing on his bed, Billy buried his face in his hands and let out a wounded sound. He didn't think he could handle anymore heartache. He'd gone in thinking he would get a second chance to be with the only woman he'd ever loved and it turned into a massive, fucking failure. Now, all he wanted to do was curl up into a ball and disappear. Laying down, he reached over and turned on his radio before pulling his comforter up around him, blocking out the memories trying to spring forward in his head. He didn't want to think about his mom anymore.

He just wanted to forget the whole thing...

Almost an hour later, Billy heard his bedroom door creak open and soft footsteps creep close to the bed. He knew it was Max, she was the only one brave enough to approach him in his room besides his dad, Neil would just barge in. He didn't even have the energy to tell her off.

He was tired...he was just so, damn tired...

It seemed, though, that Max seemed to know what happened without him telling her. She crawled up onto the bed behind him, laying flush against his back and wrapped her arm around him. She obviously knew something serious must have gone down considering Billy was even allowing her to be so close to him, but he didn't even care. Under any other circumstances he'd of shoved her off and demanded she get lost, he wasn't a child that needed coddled, but at that moment he wanted her close.

Max stayed curled up behind Billy for awhile, just listening to the music streaming from the speakers beside the bed. She hated to see her brother suffering like he was, she knew the reason why and it made her angry to think something happened with Billy's absent mother. She had never even met the women and she already hated her for causing her big brother distress.

No one was allowed to mess with Billy except Max.

Max would never actually say the words out loud, but she did love her brother. Billy took care of her in ways her own mom didn't anymore, watching out for her all while making her life difficult. Just the way siblings were supposed to.

Billy may not care about her like she cared about him, much less love her, but she would never leave him like everyone else seemed to. She wouldn't ever cause him that kind of pain.

She would love him, even if no one else would.

"I know I'm not _her_...but I'll never leave you like she did," she mumbled, tucking her head between Billy's shoulders and curling her arm tighter around him.

Billy slowly brought his hand up to cover Max's smaller one, brushing his thumb across hers. He fought back the tears threatening to fall again. He was so tired of crying, he wasn't sure there were any tears left inside him. He didn't want to accept Max's words, or her pity, but he knew that she understood, having gone through the same suffering herself with her dad. After all the bullshit he spat at her, all the unnecessary lies about it being her fault, Max still came to help him.

_She always came back..._

He didn't have a mom anymore and his dad didn't give a shit about him, but he did have Max. The little redhead that followed him around and looked at him like a mattered, even when he knew he didn't deserve it. No matter how much shit he put her through she always seemed to forgive him.

Somehow, he knew he would always have Max.

And maybe that was enough...

  
_And I remember the day when you left for Santa Monica_

_You left me to remain with all your excuses for everything_

_And I remember the time when you left for Santa Monica_

_Yeah, I remember the day you told me it's over_

_Fin_

**Author's Note:**

> I'm so sorry...
> 
> It just happened. I couldn't stop it. I apologize. 
> 
> I hope you all enjoyed! It didn't turn out quite as good as I was planning but, oh well. Always love to hear from you guys and you know I love kudos! Until next time, keep an eye out for the next drabble!


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